That picture is of my engagement ring. It’s way too big and it came out of one of those hand-crank toy vending machines at a local pizzeria. And you know what? I love it. I wouldn’t trade it for a ring encrusted with diamonds, because the man I love more than anyone else gave it to me.
Recently I ran across an ad from a jewelry company that said something along the lines of “If you get her the right ring, she’ll say yes!” I didn’t keep the ad and I don’t want to advertise for the company in any fashion. I thought to myself that if a man has to buy a woman a fancy ring to convince her to say yes, he should probably dump her, not marry her. Heck, if he has to get her a ring at all when he asks, he might want to reconsider. Another fun fact about my ring, he gave it to me around six months after we got engaged.
Honestly, the selfishness of some women and the fact that society encourages them to be selfish really flabbergasts me. They want fancy proposals, fancy rings, and “push presents”. While NSR and I joke once in awhile that I married him for his Amazon Prime account, his Dark Knight Trilogy blurays or whatever, we don’t actually mean it. He didn’t propose to me in a fancy way. I was sitting on his lap in the computer room of my mother’s house. He didn’t get me a fancy ring (though my wedding ring is gorgeous). He won’t be getting me any push presents, because there’s no reason for him to and I’ll be so gaga over the baby I won’t care anyway. Being married to him and eventually having his kids is not some sort of duty I have to be convinced to do or compensated for. It’s something I want to do.
It’s like I tweeted during ROK’s #backtothekitchen week.
If you aren’t willing to do a basic task for your man, if you aren’t willing to marry him if he doesn’t give you a fancy ring, if you aren’t willing to have his kids unless he gives you a fancy present, why are you with him? Examine your heart and remember that if you’re married to him, you can’t leave him. You have to get your heart in the right place and stop demanding compensation. A good way to start adjusting your attitude towards him is to look for his good qualities and what he does well.