I’ve been away from this blog so long I practically feel like I need to reintroduce myself. I’ll skip that though.
Some of you may or may not know that I did acquire a job around a year and a half ago. It took me awhile to get up to speed and it was tough work, but I liked it. Then, this year rolled around and I started to experience difficulty handling the job. One day in May I came home exhausted beyond comprehension and the summer was similarly hard. I worked only one or two days a week generally, but I got sick with some sort of respiratory issue every single time. During that time there was a potential threat that surfaced. My husband said, “You need a new job”. I began to look and alerted my boss I was looking. Eventually my car broke down at work due to a dead battery and after the ordeal (it was my birthday no less), I admitted, “I was really hoping the breakdown was serious enough I would have to quit” and my husband agreed. The last straw occurred when there was a tropical storm blowing in and my husband sent me a text saying “If it gets dangerous, go home”. I realized that I couldn’t obey his order and I did not like that. The growing realization that the money I was making absolutely did not make up for the stress I was inflicting on myself and my husband crystallized. Neither did it make up for all of much more important things I could not do because I was working. Everything I legitimately cared about was suffering mightily over less than $500 a month on average.
I searched frantically for a new job, but couldn’t find one.
So I did the only thing I could. I handed the reins over to God and walked over that cliff. I handed in my resignation. I still worked for four more weeks, wrote my thank you cards and said goodbye to the community I had been serving. When I got home that afternoon, my husband hugged me and said, “It’s good to have you home”. It is good to be home. I am praying hard that God will make a way for me to stay home and attend to what is actually important. I am thankful I worked that job, if only for the fact that it made me realize my place is at home serving my husband.
Of course, no one I talk to really understands that. Everyone has some reason or other to insist that I ought to keep working in some fashion. It’s been hard enough to argue them down to just suggesting part time work to me. The biggest concession I’ve gotten is from my mother, when she agreed to pray my husband gets a better job first and then pray for me after that. It really is exhausting wanting to do something that is outside of modern norms.
I feel like I need to write some sort of (preferably pithy) conclusion to this, but as it stands this whole situation is far from concluded. I’ll just have to wait and see what door God decides to open. In the mean time, your prayers are appreciated.